PULL of DEATH

Do you feel the loneliness bothering you, like death is approaching? Feeling lame and anhedonic, with a bit of catatonic. Compared to a stone on the ground, inanimate and worthless. Indeed, I am depressed again. Again and again, it ebbs and flows.

Currently, the awkward ambiance is luring me to melancholy again. The sensation is never unfamiliar, as it comes and goes on some points of my being. Ironic, I am in the habit of it, but not once at ease. Every touch of the aura aches and affects my entirety. The feeling is out of ordinary. It pours gloominess and takes away the zest in me. I feel something is pulling me down, frozen and imperceptible.


Blame it to boredom and longing. My pining to sufficient happiness is hopeless and getting worst. Boredom oftentimes envelopes my surroundings. Honestly, I can't understand the usual feeling. It makes sense the fact that I prefer to be dead than experiencing this touch of dolor. 


All I aspire is to have a life of my own, a life not dictated by any, with freedom and self-verdict.